’Tis I. The one who really, really needs her kids to be back in school already.
July has probably been the most challenging month of 2026. I’m struggling, y’all. But it wasn’t all bad, and things have already been looking up! Keep reading below, and I’ll catch you up on what’s been happening.
💕Aimee
Boho Shawl
Let’s start with the good. I started a time-consuming crochet project back in May while we were on our California/Disneyland roadtrip. Something to keep my hands busy during all the extra traveling we’ve been doing this summer.
This shawl was a labor of love and took me many, many miles on the road. I continued working on it through June and finished it in July—and I think it might be my favorite thing I’ve ever made! It’s thick and warm, and I’m so sad that it’s too hot to wear it at the moment. But come fall, this beauty will be with me on morning walks and evenings by the campfire.
The pattern is the Gouina Shawl by Expression Fiber Arts, and the yarn is the Boho Collection by Hue Loco, which is unfortunately no longer available. It’s fingering weight merino wool yarn, and I used a 4.0mm hook. My shawl used 10 skeins of yarn, but I believe the pattern only calls for 6.
Lots of Traveling – and Birthdays!
We’ve continued our summer travels through July, most recently four short trips to various cities throughout Texas. We’re leaving again for Corpus Christi this week, and the day after we get back, we’ll go on yet another short trip to Dallas!
It’s been a huge blessing to accompany my husband on his business trips. The kids love it, and it keeps them entertained for the long summer.
One of our July trips was taking the twins to Great Wolf Lodge for their birthday. It’s a kid-themed hotel with a huge indoor waterpark, a ropes-course, and lots of other activities. There’s an interactive game involving magic wands that takes the kids all over the lodge to complete quests. They absolutely loved it. I think GWL might be my kids’ new birthday tradition.
The Challenges
I want to stress that everything I’m about to say is not my kids’ fault. Children need summer breaks where they can rest and have carefree fun outside of a classroom, and I cherish the extra time with them. The twins have had a blast with all the traveling we’ve done. Now that the start of school is on the horizon, my son keeps coming to me in tears every night, asking for one more fun night at a hotel. I love that he doesn’t want summer to end.
That’s what I’m going to remember about this season. Not all the difficult bits in between.
But as any parent knows, when your kids are around 24-7, your wants and needs get put on the back-burner. Add to that the fact that I have special needs twins—one of them quite severe—and the stress, worry, and physical burden is a lot. Only people who have parented a severely autistic child understand how hard it is. If you’ve never cleaned poop off walls on a daily basis or had your kid punch you in the head or throw heavy objects at you while you’re driving, please keep your opinions and judgments to yourself.
I don’t often talk about the realities of what my husband and I deal with. I’m quite content without other people’s sympathy, and I certainly never want my kids to feel like a burden. But this summer I met another mom of an autistic kid, whom she’s parenting alone. As I talked to her, it struck me how much it helped us both to realize someone else understands. It felt good to laugh with someone about the poop on the walls instead of crying by myself.
So that’s why I’m writing here about the harder stuff. Maybe you’re in a similar situation. Maybe you love your special needs kids more than anything, but it’s slowly dawning on you that they’re getting bigger and stronger than you. Maybe you feel powerless and alone, and that’s impacted your ability to care much about yourself. Maybe life gets so heavy sometimes that all you can do with the little free time you have is rot in bed with YouTube. Maybe your health is deteriorating as a result of the stress. Maybe you’ve stopped writing or creating.
I see you. I get it.
July has been difficult, y’all. The whole summer has, in fact. And um, the eleven years before that—those were hard, too. This isn’t the first time I’ve struggled with feelings of powerlessness or the loss of my desire to write. The blessing that comes with that is the wisdom I’ve accumulated over time. I know what to do now when depression starts to take hold: reclaim my power.
When I feel overwhelmed, my go-to nervous system reaction is to FREEZE. I hide in bed with YouTube. When it gets extra bad, I literally have trouble moving my limbs. I’m not kidding. I start physically shutting down from stress.
If your nervous system freezes up like this and you feel like you can’t move, hiding in your bed with your phone will never help. Your nervous system needs to know it’s safe, and you accomplish that by doing things that you would never do if you were actually in danger—like going on a nice leisurely walk, organizing that junk drawer that’s been bugging you, painting a picture, or working on your book. Anything that tells your brain, “Hey, this is a normal day. The world is not ending. You don’t have to hide in bed anymore because you’re safe.”
So that’s what I’m going to go do after I finish this blog—maybe a walk on the treadmill with my favorite music playing. And I’ll definitely be daydreaming about my characters.
I’m so grateful for this summer. Lots of priceless memories and lessons learned.
See you in August!
There are NO link affiliations or sponsorships on this page. All opinions are my own, and I paid for everything with my own money.
Featured image by Christian Bowen on Unsplash
